


Your 'He'

by DrowningInTheRainbow



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Drabble, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-21
Updated: 2016-11-21
Packaged: 2018-09-01 06:07:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8612197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrowningInTheRainbow/pseuds/DrowningInTheRainbow
Summary: James had asked Shepard once if he had a lover. Shepard wasn’t necessarily on a communication ban, but he didn’t get a lot of messages either. Shepard only told him, “I… I loved someone. I don’t think he knew that, though.”
When Shepard lifts Kaidan’s unconscious body over his shoulder on Mars and James looks back at them with this knowing look, I just got all these feels and had to write this.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This gets a little... Oddly worded at some points. I wrote this in a bit of a rush so I apologize.
> 
> As always, please enjoy!

After James drops the lifeless machine onto the bare hospital bed, he glances over to where Shepard carefully rests Kaidan’s equally still body onto his own hospital bed. Only Shepard doesn’t stand straight. Instead, he remains crouched over Kaidan, perhaps whispering into the younger man’s ear. Whatever it was, he pulls back slightly, then all at once as Liara shouts into his face.

James doesn’t think too hard about Shepard’s reaction. He’s still piecing everything together when Shepard returns. The man, anxiety clearly formed into his face, asks tersely, “Are you alright, James?”

The young latino answers with a question, “He’s your ‘he,’ right?” Shepard is confused so James reiterates, “He’s your lover, that’s not really your lover, right?”

Shepard’s face remains blank. He replies, “Not now, James. Don’t ask me that now.” In any other condition, James would shout his triumph, Shepard’s not-answer being the only answer he needed. Instead, James shows how much of an adult he can be by solemnly nodding his head and leaving. Before the door closes, he looks back to where Shepard has taken Kaidan’s hand in his own, even daring to place his lips to the sentinel’s knuckles. James politely ignores the soft sobbing as the doors close behind him.

* * *

Four Months Ago

James throws his cards down and laughs. “I shoulda trusted Anderson when he said not to play cards with you.”

Shepard smiles. James has never seen the Commander really smile, and this is no different. That happiness never reaches his eyes and suddenly it hits James that Shepard talks about all his friends but never someone to love. “Commander, you got someone out there?”

Shepard’s not-smile falls and he tersely replies, “I don’t think you have a right to ask that, Lieutenant.” He is not harsh, only formal. Though he’d never admit it, he’s afraid.

The Lieutenant is unperturbed and reiterates: “Surely there’s someone out there who loves you. Okay, wait, I bet there are thousands out there who love you. You know what I mean; there’s someone _you love_ who loves you out there.” Shepard remains quiet. James wonders if Shepard is choosing not to answer, but gives the Commander the benefit of the doubt.

In truth, John knows he should answer the Lieutenant. He trusts James, despite their brief acquaintance. But it is hard, to say out loud the hurt he faces. With his future currently up in the air, he expects only grievances and pain. John compromises, “I… I loved someone. I don’t think he knew that though.”

* * *

John takes every chance he has during their time at the Citadel to visit Kaidan. When the Major finally wakes, John is slightly more hesitant, but nonetheless adamant. James notes the bottle in Shepard’s hands and smiles.

“What are you so happy about?” Cortez asks, following James’ eyes but not connecting with Shepard’s bottle. “Wait a minute. You’re not staring at Shepard’s ass, are you?”

James laughs, quiet enough for Shepard not to hear. “No, see that bottle in his hands? It’s for the Major.” Steve doesn’t seem to make the connection, so James adds, “It’s Alenko’s favorite, and Shepard’s giving it to him in the hospital. Alenko’s finally awake, so Shepard is nervous to go see him and hopes a gift will ease some of the tension…”

Realization washes over Steve’s face and he says, “Aww, that’s great!” Then he seems to catch onto something, “Wait just a minute. Why are you so interested in this? And how did you know about any of this?” Damn if Steve doesn’t play the nagging housewife well.

“Well, it’s kind of a long story…” James tries, but Steve taps his foot and James sighs before leading Steve to sit down.

* * *

Steve and James, downright drunk, congratulate the happy newly-formed couple as they return to the Normandy. In fact, upon seeing Shepard with his arms around Kaidan, James jumps up and shouts, _“Finally!”_ before loudly clapping the Commander on the back. Shepard nervously smiles, and James happily notes it reaches his eyes. Kaidan, on the other hand, looks very interested to learn about whatever the hell is going on.

When all is said and done, Kaidan only looks into Shepard’s eyes happily and says, “So I’m your ‘he,’ huh?” When their lips meet, there’s no question about it.


End file.
